A part of my process...

It's no secret that mustard.seed.photography has become something all it's own. It's 'people' have kindly nicknamed it my little mustard.seed Mission. Because, it is a mission of sorts.

Let me clarify:
Initially, mustard.seed.photography was born out of an overwhelming desire to adopt a child into our family. And that takes money. Gobs, even. And I've never been a 'it can happen for you but it CAN'T happen for me' kind of girl. No. Thanks to Terry and Sue Knight, I'm a bull.by.the.horns grabber.... So my photography serves as fundraising to support our adoption process. *I digress.

But that's just it. That's how God works. He only lets us see just a small part of the puzzle at a time. Then as an act of Faith, as we swim out into the deep end of life, He reveals more and more of His plan to us. But it's a bit.by.bit process. Maybe it's because I'm small. Maybe it's because I need to be enticed to Trust and revealing too much would scare me back into a habit of inaction. Either way, for whatever reason- His ways are perfect and I trust and believe and feel that with all my heart.

The past few months working towards this adoption has revealed the other bits of this mission that I'm on. Lots of self actualization. Lots of inspiration where women and children and family preservation is concerned... The honest silver lining to it all.

Without even realizing it, mustard.seed.photography has become something more... to me. To my clients. The mothers and fathers and aunts and sisters and grandparents who celebrate life through my style of portraiture.

Every session I proof, every single session- a portrait or three will catch me. Grip my heart and bring tears to my eyes. Not because they pretty... not because it was a great capture or fundamentally sound. I am gripped because in a moment, I am overcome with the Story of it all.

We all have story behind who we are... where we came from... where we are heading. Every single client has shared their poignant story behind why this photo session is a true celebration of Life for them. Every.single.one.

Take this little girl for example. She has a real story- and she doesn't even know it. Her mother knows her story. Her mother understands all the tender moments that connect this little girl's days together leading her to that exact moment when my shutter dropped capturing that face of hers. The spunk and certainty she so cleverly displays with those eyes and grin.


Her mother knows each and every event leading to this very.big.Third.birthday of hers...


We all have Stories filled with tender moments of worry punctuated by immense feelings of Gratitude... overwhelmed with the sincerity of Grace... rocked by abundant feelings of Hope.

This mustard.seed Mission is about remembering where we've come from, while celebrating the bounty of what we have right now- existing in a space where we can hold tight to what matters most of all- while looking forward to the Hope that exist on the horizon of each and every day we have together on this planet.

This mustard.seed Mission is about taking a tiny touch of Faith and stepping out in the name of Love. The pictures are just little bits of evidence that we were here Living this Life and Loving each other along the way.

And being the lady with the camera watching it all unfold... handing over the digital images for these families to have and share as they see fit... visually documenting the Blessings in their lives is an absolute honor and sincere privilege. While working to bring my daughter home, shoot by shoot, I am forever touched and changed by the Stories I hear and the families who share themselves with me.

*Let's just say that 8 months ago, I didn't see this coming. :)

Peace, love, and stories.
xo
lmkw

Finding my feet again...

Oh hello near strangers. :)

My busy 6 weeks is coming to a close. And I just want to sit down and flesh it all out. Not so much about the events- bc they were just Events. But more like my process and growth at this juncture of it all. Yes, prepare for a meaty post. *Ahem* Prepare for a long post. As you've come to expect, brevity has never been my thing. :)

It's funny now looking back over it. To be honest, I dreaded going into 4 weeks of teaching, tons of new photo shoots, etc, etc. It's not that I don't like a good challenge, it's just that I know how much my little nest relies on me being rested, centered, focused and available.

I'm a mom.
More than a teacher.
More than a photographer.
More than a house.keeper and cook.

I'm a mother.

And our bebies are simple.
They don't need much.
They certainly don't need many of the things I work to give them.
They just need me here and happy. Available. Relaxed.

and when those things get put on hold... when THOSE things get paused by Life, everything starts to stretch and pull and show signs of unraveling.

While I was busy Busting It, we got tired. We got sick. Strep throat. Never in my whole life had I ever had strep throat. We got cranky. Bedtimes got to be a nightly fuss.fest. James was emotional at every turn of the day. We had potty accidents. Streaks of them. Jax learned to whine. To beg. To be needy.

In the stretch of weeks I got angry. Lost my temper. Fussed more than I should have. Had to apologize more than ever. Did I mention being deathly ill for 48 hours? Prayed a lot. Wished a lot. Felt pitiful. Dreadfully pitiful. And worked day.by.day to get out of the trenches of being Plain Busy. Too Busy.

But I made it. We all did. *Thank you, Lord! :)

You know, life really isn't about Balance. I've heard that whole schpill for years and years now since becoming a mom. "Find you balance. Remember to balance it all. Don't forget to find your balance, etc. etc." That's one way to look at it- the Whole Balance Paradigm... I feel that there is no such thing as short term balance, anyway. The idea that in this world of technology and in this Boot.Strap.Get.Er.Done.Multi.Tasking culture- Some times you just have to Bust It! Sometimes you just have to grit through it and paddle paddle paddle to get to the other side.

And you know what? That's not a terrible.awful.how.could.you thing. It's during times like these that you begin to notice who you are and what you are capable of. I felt accomplished. In the past 6 weeks I booked my first weddings. I became a product photographer for one of the largest industrial companies in the Nation. I worked behind the camera a lot- learning. learning. growing.

And,

I learned how no matter how much effort I put forth hoping for excellence or perfection, I still needed to acknowledge the God Factor: that everything I have, do, or will do is a gift from Him. Not of my own strength or ability- but from His guidance and Will do I do. Not my merit. But His. I'm not a leaner. I'm a do.it.myselfer. So learning to lean, trust, and rely on someone else during hard/busy/tough times is hard for me. I'm a mountain.top girl. I'm learning how to let.go and trust when Life makes me a in.the.valley girl.

In the past 6 weeks, our desire to adopt became a hard and firm REALIZATION that we could adopt. Not a wish or a dream BUT an actual opportunity that is right around the bend. A real little girl out there- who will end up motherless, fatherless. A perfect little person needing something that WE can give her... something that WE have plenty of... something that WE promise to provide for the rest of her life. How utterly amazing is that!?!? Oh, the joy she provides already when we haven't even seen her face...

But also,
my boys... my sweet sweet boys. We grew together. They saw their mother work hard. They saw her give and stretch and reach. They saw her mess up, fall flat, have doubts and regrets. They saw my humaness. But they also saw me say 'i'm sorry.' They saw me value their feelings. They saw me meet their needs even when I was tired. They saw me cope. They didn't go without cuddles, or kisses, or bedtime stories.

Right now I am learning that Motherhood (specifically SAHMotherhood) isn't just about warm cookies and clean houses. It's not about providing everything our kids have ever wanted... our homes lacking nothing. It's not about creating a Risk Free Zone where their homes are little bubbles of Perfection. *How many nights have I laid down feeling defeated by not being able to arrange that kind of perfection that day, that holiday, that moment???

It's about walking through lives and relationships, engaging our kids as we go. Empowering them through our experiences and reactions and actions to walk through this life thoughtfully and reflectively. It's about helping them create a skill set full of experiences that help fortify them when they are out there making their own choices... taking their own risks... making their own relationships.

This past 6 weeks has taught me that I don't do everything right- even when I plan and work and make provisions for Perfect. But in being human, I'm able to flex and fall into what life is all about: Grace. Mercy. Faith. Hope. Kindness. Love. with Family being the compilation and full circle of it all.

***I will say, my ability to Stay At Home to raise my boys is a sacrifice. From the beginning we sat down and made two piles. We took things we enjoy from Our Pile and placed them in Our Boys' Pile. We go without. We pass up. We work towards- in order for our boys to have me home with them. At the crux of that decision is my husband. My sweet, strong, hero of a man who assumed the financial responsibility to keep us safe and moving forward in this life. He stretches. He manages. He rearranges so that we can hold tight to our little Life inside this nest. He does all of this without me even noticing a thing. He comes home available and tuned in to us. Amazing. Even when I try, I still allow things to 'bleed over' into our family time. But he takes it in stride without us knowing anything different. And in addition to the day.to.day he still encourages my dreams and passions- and sometimes that encouragement comes in the form of cold hard cash... say to make that leap some years ago to buy my first DSLR camera, for example. He's generous in all that he does and has the calm confidence that makes you want to take that next step. He makes me want to be Brave. God blessed me way beyond measure when he sent me this man.

***And the most encouraging aspect of all is that even as tiny as I am... as simple as I live... as meaningless as I am in the Whole Grand Scheme of this World, God loves me so specifically that He shows up every single day meeting my needs. He puts people in my life that are the Hands and Feet of Jesus. Through Him, they meet my needs. They Love me. They encourage me. They hold me accountable. They laugh at me and remind me to get.a.grip. He places little miracles in my day showing me that I am special and valuable and beautiful to Him.

All of this looooong post to say this:
If you ever thought you'd like to Do Something- ANYTHING. If you ever had a dream in your heart... If you ever had a God Moment where you felt pulled to do this or that- PLEASE steep that dream in prayers. Say it out loud. Develop it with the people or the person who supports you. AND take that little tiny step of faith towards that goal. It ONLY takes one single lonely step.

I'm telling you right now, all you need is that first step= bc God shows up and gives you EXACTLY what you need to take the next, and then the next. And not only are your needs met, but you Grow in the most unreasonably amazing ways. And as a result of your faith- you can encourage someone else to grab their dream and it's in THAT act of Love, that an entire family could be changed. An entire community. An entire region. An entire WORLD could be changed. Just in that tiny ripple of Faith. That tiny gift of Grace and Mercy you find when you realize that God is here with you.

So... what now?
I take a deep breath.
We enjoyed an amazing holiday weekend full of family re.connection.
I'm doing laundry again. I'm spending time on the floor with my kids. Lots of public displays of affection at inappropriate times. :) I'm taking pics of my own darlings- nothing stuffy or planned... just as our day finds us. And I'm doing the things I love most- cooking, sewing, crocheting, etc. These pictures are of our growing bebe taken yesterday as we were trying on a few of Brother's hand.me.downs...





I love this life. I love it all...

Peace, love, and Reflection.
xo
lmkw

Guess who comes home tomorrow?

James Neal! My first born. My sweet number one. Our BooBoo.

He took a quick trip to Texas to visit his grandparents- but he should be home tomorrow mid.day. Gosh! Loving a child is EASY. Missing them is oh.so.hard.

Things that I love about the stage he is in now:
-His long legs with knobby knees... with little shiny leg hairs on them.
-The way he wants to be a man in all that he does... from axe body wash to kissing me good morning, he wants to be Big.
-The way he still drags his blanket around in the morning as he wakes up.
-Listening to him talk to Marcus about life and man stuff... like raising bebies and grocery shopping.
-His affection for fairy tales about Princes and Princesses and his imagination as he acts them out... always being the Prince.
-This budding since of right and wrong... and how his little heart CAN'T STAND anything that feels wrong. Like Nemo for example: He cries big tender tears when Nemo gets taken from his Daddy. His ability to turn off a show if it challenges what makes him feel safe inside.
-His bedtime prayers... he freelances what he feels in his heart. And most nights, he leaves my heart on the verge of popping.

Oh, James... come home. It's where you belong and we can't hardly breath without you. None of us. We are waiting!

Peace, love, and long.distance.phone calls,
xo
lmkw

Hello again!

Oh! I know you don't feel it because I certainly haven't shown it... BUT I'm back and I missed you and I feel terrible about being away.

Yes, I do.

BUT trust me when I say that my absence hasn't been because I've lacked post.able things to write about OR that I lacked the desire to write... I've been busy.

BUT, you knew that already. Remember, I warned you? June is my busy month. I saw her coming. I was excited and scared before I ever met her the very first day of the month. But here I am, a little half-way through her with LOTS behind me but MORE left coming.

I've built in some slow time in July- although I keep getting desperate emails begging for summer photoshoots before fall... and you know I can't say 'no' to that. I've got a bebe to bring home! AND endless passion for family portraiture. Every shoot is an adventure and an HONOR. I've yet to drive away from a shoot, without feeling inspired, grateful, hopeful and AMAZED by the amount of love and energy mother's have with their children, husbands, etc. What a beautiful career God has built for me!!! All of that to say: looks like August may have to be my 'slow' month... ha! :)

Speaking of amazing sessions... I have completely many the past few weeks and have many on the books coming up- including a handful of newborns that will be here soonish. Each in their own time... LOTS of bebies coming up for me. Think about it: BEBIES! necked.bendy.miraculous newborns! Enough. I just can't take it. I can't wait to meet these bebe.bumps turned newborns soon. :)

WHICH won't help this pregnancy craving I've been fighting off lately. Oh, I want to be pregnant again. Oh, I'm ready for another youngin'! YES, it's true. But NO! I've got a bebe in Africa waiting for me!!! I can't go off and get pregnant until she is snuggled up safe in our nest... *sigh* Who knew I'd be this mother.earth.bring.me.childre type? Oh, but I am... bring me more bebies! :)

WHICH leads me to those tidbits! We are almost there!!! Our goal is getting closer with the adoption and we are looking forward to the end of the year to file our paperwork and get started on the homestudy and such. It.can't.come.fast.enough! But we are working hard to get her here and it feels so good to focus everyday on the little steps it is taking to get her home. She's NOT here yet. BUT she's a part of each and every day for us... through PRAYER and planning and MORE PRAYER and daydreams (oh, the daydreams). I can't believe this is my life! I can't believe that this dream is nearly a reality. I can't believe how overwhelming God's grace and mercy and LOVE is for me and my heart's desires. It's hard to wrap my brain around all that goodness. Makes me feel yellow inside. :) *And it motivates me to be kind in all I do... and generous... because I'm the receiver of the greatest Love known to Man. It's real and it fills my days up each and every day. I've got to give that away! I've got to...

I'm NOT teaching next week, so I really would love to host a post.a.day just to prove to you all that my BLOG isn't the red.headed.step.child in my life. :) Even if it's just for fun and for sillies. I'm doing it!

But for now, here are a few images from recent sessions that I'm proud of. Remember if you are interested in some mustard.seed.photography LOVE, email me at mustardseedphoto@gmail.com OR contact me through my website.

Now, for a little mustard.seed Bounty:








*The last isn't watermarked... I know. It's of my nephew. I was hired to come out and take team pictures, etc. What? mustard.seed action photography!?!? Yeah, nuts. :) Speaking of exciting new genres.... I'm working on something pretty dadgum exciting. Don't want to speak too soon, but mustard.seed.photography is beginning to consider an exciting new avenue of photography! Any guesses? ;)

Okay, I want to update you on my boy.joys soon! But for now, I sleep.
Thanks for loving me even when you click my page to see the same old update for two.weeks.straight!!! I'll do better as my life slows down. I will. I really really will.

Until then,
Peace, love, and Abundance.
xo
lmkw

Resurfacing

Yep, I'm back... briefly.

I can honestly say that the past two months time has been flying forward at warp speed. Perhaps this is Sign One that I am truly an adult. Our little birds are getting bigger and have begun new things like Tball and Almost.There.Walking. To highlight our busy schedule, the MommaBird has taken on more than ever before- a booming creative cottage business through her photography, and summer classes have begun at the Driving School. I can't say NO to any of our obligations because well, I love each one too much to choose a favorite. AND we are managing just fine through it all. :)

I miss writing though. I want to share more than just hasty updates thrown together over morning coffee... I want to write. Draft, revise, publish. I want the PROCESS of writing again. BUT I'm not gonna sweat it at this point.

June is my Big Month. Four classes of teenagers. Loads of editing and mustard.seed.photography shoots galore. My plan? Gather up my courage, keep things in perspective, delegate, and keep the java flowing. I'll work my way through it- and take it easyish in July and August.

Life is good. I turned 29 years old this past Monday. In that 24 hour span, 29 years after I arrived on this planet, I did three things I love with all of my heart: teaching. photography. and was a mother to my boy.joys. It's hard to believe that in my life, the things that I love most... my childhood dreams have come true. I've reached those goals and am working hard to meet more.

I have stories to share! My crazy furniture story! To make it short and sweet- I ran across a circa1940's dining room set of furniture while antique shopping with my mom (a little pre-birthday day.away). Bakelite knobs. Beautiful details. Incredible price. I loved it, Marcus knew it, and two days later it showed up at my house looking for a good home. Who said dining room furniture was for the Dining Room? I've turned one piece into a furniture cabinet in my bedroom. I love our little nest. And I love that it looks like us around here.

The boys are well! James finished up his first Tball season on a high.note. He was awarded the Game Ball- and it was a beautiful thing. I'm not sure he's ever wanted a single thing more in this life than that Game Ball... it would even show up in his prayers from time to time. :) As proud as I am of our first.born, I'm even prouder of his daddy. It was Marcus' first time coaching something like this- and I can honestly say that 12 little boys here in Zachary were encouraged by the kindest and most capable Coach around. It's amazing how his temperament and love.of.the.game makes him uniquely suited to mentor kids. I couldn't have been any prouder... of BOTH boys.

Jackson is growing before our eyes! He's something else, in fact. He's talking up a storm and walking everywhere (as long as there is a finger to hold on to). He has been ready to walk for a month, standing and sitting without any assistance at all. BUT he refuses to strike out on his own without help. Hard.headed, that on. And SMART!

I'm teaching next week- then will be off for a week. I hope to catch back up soon...
Until then, here are a couple of images from the past week or so. :)


***Thanks for the emails and comments fussing at me to update. Makes me smile!

Peace, love, and a.day.off!
xo
lmkw

mustard.seed.photography : { Baton Rouge, Louisiana Photographer }

Oh! It's been nearly a week since we've been back from Texas and I haven't updated the bloggity.

A sign of the times for sure.

Our trip was fantastic. I slept, I shopped, I found vintage treasures, I got some date.time in with theHotness. Yea for Texas! :)

So- I updated my website with recent material from a handful of different shoots. Lately I've shot a lot of children sessions- so be sure to check out the 'Sprouts' tab. BUT there are heaps of new photographs in each category. Stop by and check them out! And if you want to say "Hi" drop some Contact love my way. :)

See that cute little polaroid button there to the right? -> Click it to view my site.

I've had LOTS of questions lately regarding Maternity and Newborn sessions. I need to start a photography blog and create a FB fan page- but until then, let me answer a few questions here.

When should I schedule a maternity shoot? What point in my pregnancy photographs best?

-Pregnancy is a crazy thing- and affects us expecting mother's all differently.
When I was pregnant I went through THREE distinct phases:
1.) I just look chubby.
2.) Perfectly.Pregnant
3.) Strutted.and.Swollen.don't.tell.me.I'm.pretty.you.are.lying pregnant.

So, I would say when YOU feel beautifully pregnant- let's do the session. Even if your bump isn't planet big yet--- but you feel beautiful in your own skin. I find that most women reach that perfectly.pregnant mark between week 27 - 32. *Contact me early so I can work you into my schedule.

I really want newborn portraits. How does that work? When should I book you and when/where do they take place?

-For infant photography I want to shoot within the first 7 days of birth. Anything up to two weeks would 'work' but TRUST ME, the earlier the better! They grow so fast and soon become very alert. For those peaceful, sleeping, curly bebe shots- let's shoot for any daytime within the first week.

-My infant photography takes place at your home. I bring the equipment I need to provide a variety of 'styles' there while you are tucked into the comfort of your own nest. *if you prefer location shoots for your infant, let's talk and see how we can maximize that style, without being too intrusive to the needs of the Tiny One.

-We can't schedule bebies. I've tried with my own- but they come when they come, inspite of my planning. :) I've been booking upwards of 2 months in advance (with a few exceptions) so CONTACT ME as soon as possible of your desires for a newborn shoot--- even if your due date is 4 or 6 months away- that way I can pencil your desires in during a month before your due date, just in case bebe surprises us early.

I want some mustard.seed Love. How early do I need to schedule my session?

-As soon as you know mustard.seed is for you... or as soon as you think it could be for you, let me know! I can give you an idea what my calendar looks like and will save the date of your choice. BUT more importantly, it will open up our communication and vision towards planning the perfect shoot for you and/or your family.

With a little time and deliberate planning, we can really create something special together. ***Right now I'm booked a month and a half out- with a couple of spots still available. Contact me ASAP for sessions in June/July- bc I only have select spots left. If you want to schedule FALL sessions, email now to get first dibs on dates.


A HUGE thank you to all of the mustard.seed supporters out there! Your little notes of encouragement serve as HUGE sources of inspiration as I refine my vision as a photographer. I'm just like you- 'cept with a camera and a wild.fire of passion for documenting the Extraordinary that is right under our noses.

It's not about creating something beautiful- because the creation is already done, spectacular, and has very little to do with US. It has to do with sincerely documenting the Spectacular that we've been entrusted with:

Your engagement. Your marriage. Your man. Your journey towards Motherhood. The miracle of birth. Your child. The connection between siblings. Your journey towards adulthood. The celebration of Seniors. The things you love. The people you love. The life you love.

That's what mustard.seed.photography is about. Your story and the Bounty within that story.

Take a minute to peruse my website!

Feel free to contact me and say "Hello."

peace, love, and vision.
xo
lmkw

A quick note before we head out...

Mother's day was like honey. It was just the thing I needed to remind me how the best things in life are right under my nose (or feet, rather). I woke up easy... was greeted with coffee and breakfast in bed... cards from each of my boys... some that sang songs, some that said really sincere things. Each being just right.

Then we headed out for a sword fight at NaNa's. James and NaNa have perfected their pirate play- and nothing beats watching them fence.it.out while sitting on the couch sipping coffee, adding the occasional motherly 'okay, now that's getting too rough' comment.

We met our favorite girls for a Mother's Day dinner at our favorite place then went to spend the evening downtown watching the sunset and letting the kids (husbands included) roll around in the grass and play ball. *Yes, there is always some sort of ball involved. I don't even pack one- it's just never out of reach from my boys for some reason.

theHotness insisted on bringing the camera along bc it's his tradition to grab a few 'momma and bebe' pics on Mother's Day. He thinks about these things... and he's actually really good at handling the 'big camera' and getting some good shots. I love that deliberate side of him.

So we ended our day doing what we do best: laughing, loving, and chasing down children.

It was perfection.

Here are a few shots I couldn't help but process before we head out. I love them all.












OH! A beautiful day... Just what this little momma needed. :)

Now, off to Texas for a spell. Not sure if I'm gonna blog while I'm away... But you'll see me again when we get home. :)

Peace, love, and vintage.baton.rouge.
xo
lmkw