Friday, December 10, 2010

Hello, Rest and Relaxation... and Reflection.

Hi friends,

It's 8:30 am.

I woke around 7am when theHotness kissed me goodbye on his way out the door to work. I love the way he smells of soap, toothpaste, and cologne when he leaves out to face this big.bad.world for us. I laid in bed for a while longer watching the light reflecting off the lake dance on my bedroom ceiling... how does it dooo that? Then I rolled out of bed, grabbed my red rove- you remember the one? The one James insisted I have last Christmas and promptly told me about once they came in from shopping?

I walked through my house... the warm cypress woodwork, the fresh grey walls, the cold tile leading down the hall to James' room. I crept up to the top bunk and started kissing and smelling his head. He is all knees and elbows but his cheeks are still chubby. His fat cherub lips still pout when he sleeps. I nuzzled him until he finally woke to shrug me off. "Momma? Daddy never does that,' he says to me in his brand new morning voice. "I know, Love."

"Why you do that?" he asks sort of annoyed. I sigh, trying to pick out the best reason for loving my children to death... I couldn't settle on one good reason, so I launched into something like: it's because you grew inside my belly for 9 months. It's because I lost all reason when you were born healthy and placed into my arms. It's because you are my proof that God is faithful and full of grace. It's because I watched your pensive face melt into your first smile. I felt the knobby ridge of your first tooth peek through your gummy smile that day in the bath tub. Your first step. The day you found my lipstick. The way you'd lick the top of your daddy's head when you were on his shoulders. The way you'd belly.laugh in your sling when I'd smash garlic when cooking your dinner... I watched you leave me to take your first bus ride. I held my breath as you finally returned to me that afternoon... All of this. All of these things. And all the things that will ever happen from here on out with you. It's endless. That's why.

By this point, we were thick into the decision of what to wear for Free Dress Day. I had several well coordinated outfits laid out for scrutiny. Naturally, none made the cut. As usual, he wanted to wear his T.Ball sliding pants and one of his football or soccer jerseys. All of which are too small for him to leave the house and go out in public. *James has grown 7 inches in the past 2.5 months. Yes, seriously. James, you don't know this, but you have 3 NFL authentic jerseys and a professional soccer jersey coming your way for Christmas. With these gifts I fully understand that I'll never get you to wear anything else ever again... I'm sure you'll be on a strict 4 outfit rotation for the rest of your life. But at least I will have the satisfaction that you will be wearing clothes that FIT. All of this in hopes to avoid the next teary FreeDress morning when I have to explain again why you can't wear your France soccer jersey to school. (Carmen, remember that jersey?) You've worn it weekly then daily since you were TWO. It has seen a good run, Dearest.

Then after 5 more minutes of prep time, he was running out the door to catch the bus. Book sack bobbing up and down as he jogged down the driveway, across the street, then a quick pause as he gave his bus driver a High.Five.

The past two days I've been sadish. I'm coming off an incredibly successful and busy mustard.seed.photography year. There was no way I could expect the overwhelming response to my work. It's been amazing and I've grown so much professionally and personally. I'm 100% grateful for it all! But I'm a touch tired. I'm anxious to pause MSP work so I can recoup some much needed family time. I still have some lingering work... but for the most part, I won't be producing new work until January. I'm anxious to refocus on my family and this season. Just a mini.holiday respite.

Which brings me to the fact that each year that passes, my boys get a year older. James will be FIVE years old in 19 days.

Maybe because he was my first... or the fact that I had a high.risk pregnancy... or because he followed a miscarriage... or because he was born at the most nostalgic time of the year... I always get emotional around his birthday. It's not a marked 'sadness' but it is an overwhelming sense of gratefulness.


My life changed the day he was born. I became myself when he was born. Then I think about where Marcus and I were when we became parents. Our love. Our hopes. Our finances or lack of. It makes me swell up inside. God gifted US with James... and our lives have never been the same. Everyday is filled with an unconditional, tangible Love that we never could have expected. And that Love became Jackson... and will become our daughter as we make our way to her. As a woman, nothing has ever compared to the Purpose I feel tending my nest and my bitties.




And when I reflect on this transformation and the Hope that I feel moving forward raising up these boys... I am undone. For a spell. A day or two.

I'm hoping a weekend steeped in family festivities with my three boys will help my aching heart.

Peace, love, and gingerbread.
xo
lmkw

Wednesday, October 13, 2010

Things I shouldn't forget...



My moonshine.
My beaux jack.
My moon.eyed boy.
My first.born.



James has been in school now for 2 months or so... a very big step for this pre.schooler. A very big step for his momma. Things have shifted some in our little nest to accommodate such Huge Happenings. Some for better. Some for worse, maybe?

When James was 18months old, I can remember him trying a little independence on for size. He could walk. He could talk. He could sneak and demand and make grown people spring into action to produce whatever it was that he wanted in a moments notice.

One day, at wits end, I confessed to my best friend... she laughed and promised me something I will never forget. It was simple. And it's been my parenting mantra every since... Even when I feel like I am losing my grip with towing the line with these boys... about to crash into the Parental.Purgatory- I remind myself of this very important phrase. My friend promised that 'it was just a phase.' Just like a mother who whispers 'it's only a dream' when you wake scared and fitful... I trusted her. I still do. When things get out.of.sync, when I question theUniverse and ponder if alien life form has, indeed, taken possession of my moon.eyed 4yo body, I repeat to myself (sometimes audibly) IT'S JUST A PHASE. Sometimes it's more of a plea. Sometimes it's a battle cry. And sometimes it's proven advice I hand over to other friends who may.or.maynot be questioning their own parental sanity.

IT'S JUST A PHASE

And the thing is, it really is just a phase. SO far, so good!
*knocking on my wooden editing desk*

My boyJoy has gone off to school to learn about the BigBadWorld and every day, at the perfect time, he runs off the school bus and swaggers up to the house wanting water and to talk about his travels. As his mother, and biggest fan, I listen with baited breath, hanging on every.word.

I miss him. I miss our time together. And, like all whimsy.in.love.mothers, I have such high expectations of our remaining day together...

Along with wisdom and experience comes a few side.effects of growing up. At school he has learn how to tilt his voice just right, begging for things. A whine. He's learned to whine as well as any child. He's learned to push, shove, and yank things away if he wants them... Fake crying for things? Nailed. He's learned how to infuriate grown.educated.adults into a tizzy with catch.phrases like: I don't knooooow. I don't waaaaant to. But whhhhhhy? It's like he sees these other children and the cool 'tricks' they know, stuffs them deeply into his pockets and then brings them home to try on for size for Momma and Daddy.

So for the past 8 weeks, we've been steadily undo.ing some of these nasty, yet tempting, social habits. And after we ripped theWhine off, stripped theBully out, stomped theMelodrama down, and scrubbed theBackTalk clean, theHotness and I are totally wiped out.

Nothing thrills me and that man more than being parents... Waking up everyday to meet the crazy needs of raising up our boys and tending our nest. We are steeped deep into this domesticBliss we've created and been Blessed with. So when we see our little chics stray from the nest or act plain.ole.ugly- we ponder the meaning of Life, Love, and Everything.Holy. It's exhausting.

And then I hear a familiar refrain circling around:

It's only a phase.

Then I utter it up in prayer... It's only a phase?

Please, God, let it be.

:)

I love these boys. The ups. The downs. The in.betweens. Everyday we wake up together is pure magic. We work so hard and go without in order to keep me here with these children. I don't want someone else doing this job for me... even though some days I feel that this kind of Courage is faulty and I'm the worst mother on PlanetEarth. This is exactly where I should be. Where I want to be. Where absolute Joy is found. I can't wait for another bebe... and then another, even. As exhausting as bringing up boys can be, there isn't a single place I'd rather be.



Oh James Neal, you've got my heart. Some days, don't squeeze it so hard? Mkay?



Peace, love, and gut.busting.mantras.
xo
lmkw

Friday, October 8, 2010

Our days...

Why hello!

:)
A question for you:

How do professional photographers get pictures of their kids???

One possible answer:

Substandard, grainy, but oh.so.convenient cell phone camera! ;)

**********

Mustard.seed.photography is a beautiful beast- and I'm now working behind the camera hours and hours a week... and then the piles of uncut.raw.images stack up and turn into even more countless hours behind the computer at my editing desk. And with October in the air, I feel a bit like a mad.scientist working feverishly at her creation... a little bit of this, a pinch of that... wild music crooning over Pandora... candles flickering in the corner of my creative space... my signature wild hair standing straight up and positively crooked.

I love it. Every minute, mind you. I do.

So, it's really true that working photographers find a hard time capturing their daily life and family adequately. Where is the time? But thank goodness for my handy.dandy.Iphone!

So in efforts to get this blog pointed in the right direction, lets review the past 5 weeks in our little Nest- compliments of Lola, the ever loyal cellular device. :)

Que the image.update! :)


We kept things clean.ish... mostly. Some of us helped more than others...


We had days where we needed a little freedom...


Days when we really just needed to break.it.down and dance, for reals.


Days when we needed to stand out.


Days when we just wanted to fit in... and be apart of something bigger.


More days of standing.out (it's the Knight.way)...


Followed by more days when we just wanted to fit in...


Confident days.


Days of thrilling thrifted.victories.


Sewing days! Where we realized it pays to be creative... and willing to see things through.


Days full of RePurposing... and the momentum found in Ideas.


Days full of Love, punctuated by Liquid.Courage...


Comforting days of beautiful routine and favorite moments...


Days filled of booksack reminders that we are Blessed... and Love really does Live Here.


Naughty days...


Days (or weeks) where we met new friends and learned new skilz...


Days filled with passion doing what we do best of all...


Dental.hygene obsession... every day. (every.single.day)


In.Love days when I'm rocked to the core by a Romance, by a man, who makes dreams come true...


Starting.new.collection Days...


Welcoming.New.Seasons days...


Days where Practice.makes.Perfect...


Fragile days when mostly everything hurt... Days of loss... struggle days.


Thoughtful days when we reconsidered what matters most of all...


Days of longing... wishing... waiting...


Days with long hours, deadlines, and hard work... hard.beautiful.i.can't.believe.this.is.my.life Work.


Moments of beauty in the constant rush of Daily.Grind.ing.


Craving days... that could only be filled with Lebanese food and rose.water...


Days where we felt proud, simple, and connected.



I.feel.pretty days...


...AND...

Almost.Perfect.Days


(I've missed you, friends. I enjoyed the update.)

Peace, Love, and re.connecting.
xo
lmkw

Tuesday, August 24, 2010

Shhh... I'm still here...

Oh quiet, cold little blog space... I do miss you.

Life is full, busy, and pushing me forward.
In my quiet moments, however few and far between- my body aches for sleep... or it aches to sit as close as possible to my husband's shirtless arms on the couch. He smells like bread and goodness.

So, in those moments, I sleep or sit.

I want to tell you things...
so many things.
All good things.

Will I ever have a time to properly fill in the spaces that I've left wide open? Maybe I will just move on and leave out the details of summer... Keep them to myself? That seems unusual...

But for now, know that things are well! mustard.seed.photography is living and breathing and growing and bossing me around most of my days. I love it. With all my heart. James is now in school- and he smells of paste glue and crayons. I'm so happy for my boy. I miss him. But mostly I'm happy that he runs home to me in the afternoon smelling of playgrounds and books, filled to the brim with stories. Jax is still pure joy. He dazzles me and I find myself just watching him Live. Our gift. The adoption is right on track- almost everything is in place. She's as real to us as if she were here in my arms now... and I love that tangible feeling. I've been cooking again. Painting. Sewing. Tending. Preparing.

Life if good and full of promise. I sense a feeling that our lives are about to burst open... like we are on a precipice of some sort... Maybe it's the adoption? I can't pin the feeling down. I can't quite anticipate the details. But we are knee deep in adventure right now- and I feel as if we are about to get swept over... like the swell before the wave... and I'm okay with that. I know who made the tides... so no worries here.. just Thrill. At first, that kind of Trust made me anxious inside. All pickled with worry and doubt. But now? I realize that Trust is like the sun, pressing in and stealing away the darkness and doubt... soon it will wear your little body out... until you find a still, quiet spot on the porch and curl up on the brass bed and drift away to sleep. It's a good feeling. The best?

I wonder what this feeling will amount too? Makes me daydream...

Ran across something beautiful... I wanted to share.


Off to cook dinner for my Kindreds... :)

Oh, I miss this place. Please hold the space for a bit longer... I feel the pendulum swinging the other way soon.

Peace, love, and sundried tomatoes and artichokes,
xo
lmkw

Wednesday, July 7, 2010

A part of my process...

It's no secret that mustard.seed.photography has become something all it's own. It's 'people' have kindly nicknamed it my little mustard.seed Mission. Because, it is a mission of sorts.

Let me clarify:
Initially, mustard.seed.photography was born out of an overwhelming desire to adopt a child into our family. And that takes money. Gobs, even. And I've never been a 'it can happen for you but it CAN'T happen for me' kind of girl. No. Thanks to Terry and Sue Knight, I'm a bull.by.the.horns grabber.... So my photography serves as fundraising to support our adoption process. *I digress.

But that's just it. That's how God works. He only lets us see just a small part of the puzzle at a time. Then as an act of Faith, as we swim out into the deep end of life, He reveals more and more of His plan to us. But it's a bit.by.bit process. Maybe it's because I'm small. Maybe it's because I need to be enticed to Trust and revealing too much would scare me back into a habit of inaction. Either way, for whatever reason- His ways are perfect and I trust and believe and feel that with all my heart.

The past few months working towards this adoption has revealed the other bits of this mission that I'm on. Lots of self actualization. Lots of inspiration where women and children and family preservation is concerned... The honest silver lining to it all.

Without even realizing it, mustard.seed.photography has become something more... to me. To my clients. The mothers and fathers and aunts and sisters and grandparents who celebrate life through my style of portraiture.

Every session I proof, every single session- a portrait or three will catch me. Grip my heart and bring tears to my eyes. Not because they pretty... not because it was a great capture or fundamentally sound. I am gripped because in a moment, I am overcome with the Story of it all.

We all have story behind who we are... where we came from... where we are heading. Every single client has shared their poignant story behind why this photo session is a true celebration of Life for them. Every.single.one.

Take this little girl for example. She has a real story- and she doesn't even know it. Her mother knows her story. Her mother understands all the tender moments that connect this little girl's days together leading her to that exact moment when my shutter dropped capturing that face of hers. The spunk and certainty she so cleverly displays with those eyes and grin.


Her mother knows each and every event leading to this very.big.Third.birthday of hers...


We all have Stories filled with tender moments of worry punctuated by immense feelings of Gratitude... overwhelmed with the sincerity of Grace... rocked by abundant feelings of Hope.

This mustard.seed Mission is about remembering where we've come from, while celebrating the bounty of what we have right now- existing in a space where we can hold tight to what matters most of all- while looking forward to the Hope that exist on the horizon of each and every day we have together on this planet.

This mustard.seed Mission is about taking a tiny touch of Faith and stepping out in the name of Love. The pictures are just little bits of evidence that we were here Living this Life and Loving each other along the way.

And being the lady with the camera watching it all unfold... handing over the digital images for these families to have and share as they see fit... visually documenting the Blessings in their lives is an absolute honor and sincere privilege. While working to bring my daughter home, shoot by shoot, I am forever touched and changed by the Stories I hear and the families who share themselves with me.

*Let's just say that 8 months ago, I didn't see this coming. :)

Peace, love, and stories.
xo
lmkw

Finding my feet again...


Oh hello near strangers. :)

My busy 6 weeks is coming to a close. And I just want to sit down and flesh it all out. Not so much about the events- bc they were just Events. But more like my process and growth at this juncture of it all. Yes, prepare for a meaty post. *Ahem* Prepare for a long post. As you've come to expect, brevity has never been my thing. :)

It's funny now looking back over it. To be honest, I dreaded going into 4 weeks of teaching, tons of new photo shoots, etc, etc. It's not that I don't like a good challenge, it's just that I know how much my little nest relies on me being rested, centered, focused and available.

I'm a mom.
More than a teacher.
More than a photographer.
More than a house.keeper and cook.

I'm a mother.

And our bebies are simple.
They don't need much.
They certainly don't need many of the things I work to give them.
They just need me here and happy. Available. Relaxed.

and when those things get put on hold... when THOSE things get paused by Life, everything starts to stretch and pull and show signs of unraveling.

While I was busy Busting It, we got tired. We got sick. Strep throat. Never in my whole life had I ever had strep throat. We got cranky. Bedtimes got to be a nightly fuss.fest. James was emotional at every turn of the day. We had potty accidents. Streaks of them. Jax learned to whine. To beg. To be needy.

In the stretch of weeks I got angry. Lost my temper. Fussed more than I should have. Had to apologize more than ever. Did I mention being deathly ill for 48 hours? Prayed a lot. Wished a lot. Felt pitiful. Dreadfully pitiful. And worked day.by.day to get out of the trenches of being Plain Busy. Too Busy.

But I made it. We all did. *Thank you, Lord! :)

You know, life really isn't about Balance. I've heard that whole schpill for years and years now since becoming a mom. "Find you balance. Remember to balance it all. Don't forget to find your balance, etc. etc." That's one way to look at it- the Whole Balance Paradigm... I feel that there is no such thing as short term balance, anyway. The idea that in this world of technology and in this Boot.Strap.Get.Er.Done.Multi.Tasking culture- Some times you just have to Bust It! Sometimes you just have to grit through it and paddle paddle paddle to get to the other side.

And you know what? That's not a terrible.awful.how.could.you thing. It's during times like these that you begin to notice who you are and what you are capable of. I felt accomplished. In the past 6 weeks I booked my first weddings. I became a product photographer for one of the largest industrial companies in the Nation. I worked behind the camera a lot- learning. learning. growing.

And,

I learned how no matter how much effort I put forth hoping for excellence or perfection, I still needed to acknowledge the God Factor: that everything I have, do, or will do is a gift from Him. Not of my own strength or ability- but from His guidance and Will do I do. Not my merit. But His. I'm not a leaner. I'm a do.it.myselfer. So learning to lean, trust, and rely on someone else during hard/busy/tough times is hard for me. I'm a mountain.top girl. I'm learning how to let.go and trust when Life makes me a in.the.valley girl.

In the past 6 weeks, our desire to adopt became a hard and firm REALIZATION that we could adopt. Not a wish or a dream BUT an actual opportunity that is right around the bend. A real little girl out there- who will end up motherless, fatherless. A perfect little person needing something that WE can give her... something that WE have plenty of... something that WE promise to provide for the rest of her life. How utterly amazing is that!?!? Oh, the joy she provides already when we haven't even seen her face...

But also,
my boys... my sweet sweet boys. We grew together. They saw their mother work hard. They saw her give and stretch and reach. They saw her mess up, fall flat, have doubts and regrets. They saw my humaness. But they also saw me say 'i'm sorry.' They saw me value their feelings. They saw me meet their needs even when I was tired. They saw me cope. They didn't go without cuddles, or kisses, or bedtime stories.

Right now I am learning that Motherhood (specifically SAHMotherhood) isn't just about warm cookies and clean houses. It's not about providing everything our kids have ever wanted... our homes lacking nothing. It's not about creating a Risk Free Zone where their homes are little bubbles of Perfection. *How many nights have I laid down feeling defeated by not being able to arrange that kind of perfection that day, that holiday, that moment???

It's about walking through lives and relationships, engaging our kids as we go. Empowering them through our experiences and reactions and actions to walk through this life thoughtfully and reflectively. It's about helping them create a skill set full of experiences that help fortify them when they are out there making their own choices... taking their own risks... making their own relationships.

This past 6 weeks has taught me that I don't do everything right- even when I plan and work and make provisions for Perfect. But in being human, I'm able to flex and fall into what life is all about: Grace. Mercy. Faith. Hope. Kindness. Love. with Family being the compilation and full circle of it all.

***I will say, my ability to Stay At Home to raise my boys is a sacrifice. From the beginning we sat down and made two piles. We took things we enjoy from Our Pile and placed them in Our Boys' Pile. We go without. We pass up. We work towards- in order for our boys to have me home with them. At the crux of that decision is my husband. My sweet, strong, hero of a man who assumed the financial responsibility to keep us safe and moving forward in this life. He stretches. He manages. He rearranges so that we can hold tight to our little Life inside this nest. He does all of this without me even noticing a thing. He comes home available and tuned in to us. Amazing. Even when I try, I still allow things to 'bleed over' into our family time. But he takes it in stride without us knowing anything different. And in addition to the day.to.day he still encourages my dreams and passions- and sometimes that encouragement comes in the form of cold hard cash... say to make that leap some years ago to buy my first DSLR camera, for example. He's generous in all that he does and has the calm confidence that makes you want to take that next step. He makes me want to be Brave. God blessed me way beyond measure when he sent me this man.

***And the most encouraging aspect of all is that even as tiny as I am... as simple as I live... as meaningless as I am in the Whole Grand Scheme of this World, God loves me so specifically that He shows up every single day meeting my needs. He puts people in my life that are the Hands and Feet of Jesus. Through Him, they meet my needs. They Love me. They encourage me. They hold me accountable. They laugh at me and remind me to get.a.grip. He places little miracles in my day showing me that I am special and valuable and beautiful to Him.

All of this looooong post to say this:
If you ever thought you'd like to Do Something- ANYTHING. If you ever had a dream in your heart... If you ever had a God Moment where you felt pulled to do this or that- PLEASE steep that dream in prayers. Say it out loud. Develop it with the people or the person who supports you. AND take that little tiny step of faith towards that goal. It ONLY takes one single lonely step.

I'm telling you right now, all you need is that first step= bc God shows up and gives you EXACTLY what you need to take the next, and then the next. And not only are your needs met, but you Grow in the most unreasonably amazing ways. And as a result of your faith- you can encourage someone else to grab their dream and it's in THAT act of Love, that an entire family could be changed. An entire community. An entire region. An entire WORLD could be changed. Just in that tiny ripple of Faith. That tiny gift of Grace and Mercy you find when you realize that God is here with you.

So... what now?
I take a deep breath.
We enjoyed an amazing holiday weekend full of family re.connection.
I'm doing laundry again. I'm spending time on the floor with my kids. Lots of public displays of affection at inappropriate times. :) I'm taking pics of my own darlings- nothing stuffy or planned... just as our day finds us. And I'm doing the things I love most- cooking, sewing, crocheting, etc. These pictures are of our growing bebe taken yesterday as we were trying on a few of Brother's hand.me.downs...





I love this life. I love it all...

Peace, love, and Reflection.
xo
lmkw

Friday, June 18, 2010

Guess who comes home tomorrow?

James Neal! My first born. My sweet number one. Our BooBoo.

He took a quick trip to Texas to visit his grandparents- but he should be home tomorrow mid.day. Gosh! Loving a child is EASY. Missing them is oh.so.hard.

Things that I love about the stage he is in now:
-His long legs with knobby knees... with little shiny leg hairs on them.
-The way he wants to be a man in all that he does... from axe body wash to kissing me good morning, he wants to be Big.
-The way he still drags his blanket around in the morning as he wakes up.
-Listening to him talk to Marcus about life and man stuff... like raising bebies and grocery shopping.
-His affection for fairy tales about Princes and Princesses and his imagination as he acts them out... always being the Prince.
-This budding since of right and wrong... and how his little heart CAN'T STAND anything that feels wrong. Like Nemo for example: He cries big tender tears when Nemo gets taken from his Daddy. His ability to turn off a show if it challenges what makes him feel safe inside.
-His bedtime prayers... he freelances what he feels in his heart. And most nights, he leaves my heart on the verge of popping.

Oh, James... come home. It's where you belong and we can't hardly breath without you. None of us. We are waiting!

Peace, love, and long.distance.phone calls,
xo
lmkw

Thursday, June 17, 2010

Hello again!

Oh! I know you don't feel it because I certainly haven't shown it... BUT I'm back and I missed you and I feel terrible about being away.

Yes, I do.

BUT trust me when I say that my absence hasn't been because I've lacked post.able things to write about OR that I lacked the desire to write... I've been busy.

BUT, you knew that already. Remember, I warned you? June is my busy month. I saw her coming. I was excited and scared before I ever met her the very first day of the month. But here I am, a little half-way through her with LOTS behind me but MORE left coming.

I've built in some slow time in July- although I keep getting desperate emails begging for summer photoshoots before fall... and you know I can't say 'no' to that. I've got a bebe to bring home! AND endless passion for family portraiture. Every shoot is an adventure and an HONOR. I've yet to drive away from a shoot, without feeling inspired, grateful, hopeful and AMAZED by the amount of love and energy mother's have with their children, husbands, etc. What a beautiful career God has built for me!!! All of that to say: looks like August may have to be my 'slow' month... ha! :)

Speaking of amazing sessions... I have completely many the past few weeks and have many on the books coming up- including a handful of newborns that will be here soonish. Each in their own time... LOTS of bebies coming up for me. Think about it: BEBIES! necked.bendy.miraculous newborns! Enough. I just can't take it. I can't wait to meet these bebe.bumps turned newborns soon. :)

WHICH won't help this pregnancy craving I've been fighting off lately. Oh, I want to be pregnant again. Oh, I'm ready for another youngin'! YES, it's true. But NO! I've got a bebe in Africa waiting for me!!! I can't go off and get pregnant until she is snuggled up safe in our nest... *sigh* Who knew I'd be this mother.earth.bring.me.childre type? Oh, but I am... bring me more bebies! :)

WHICH leads me to those tidbits! We are almost there!!! Our goal is getting closer with the adoption and we are looking forward to the end of the year to file our paperwork and get started on the homestudy and such. It.can't.come.fast.enough! But we are working hard to get her here and it feels so good to focus everyday on the little steps it is taking to get her home. She's NOT here yet. BUT she's a part of each and every day for us... through PRAYER and planning and MORE PRAYER and daydreams (oh, the daydreams). I can't believe this is my life! I can't believe that this dream is nearly a reality. I can't believe how overwhelming God's grace and mercy and LOVE is for me and my heart's desires. It's hard to wrap my brain around all that goodness. Makes me feel yellow inside. :) *And it motivates me to be kind in all I do... and generous... because I'm the receiver of the greatest Love known to Man. It's real and it fills my days up each and every day. I've got to give that away! I've got to...

I'm NOT teaching next week, so I really would love to host a post.a.day just to prove to you all that my BLOG isn't the red.headed.step.child in my life. :) Even if it's just for fun and for sillies. I'm doing it!

But for now, here are a few images from recent sessions that I'm proud of. Remember if you are interested in some mustard.seed.photography LOVE, email me at mustardseedphoto@gmail.com OR contact me through my website.

Now, for a little mustard.seed Bounty:








*The last isn't watermarked... I know. It's of my nephew. I was hired to come out and take team pictures, etc. What? mustard.seed action photography!?!? Yeah, nuts. :) Speaking of exciting new genres.... I'm working on something pretty dadgum exciting. Don't want to speak too soon, but mustard.seed.photography is beginning to consider an exciting new avenue of photography! Any guesses? ;)

Okay, I want to update you on my boy.joys soon! But for now, I sleep.
Thanks for loving me even when you click my page to see the same old update for two.weeks.straight!!! I'll do better as my life slows down. I will. I really really will.

Until then,
Peace, love, and Abundance.
xo
lmkw