Today is the first day 'back.to.normal.' You see, 4 days ago we started a new year... Year 2011... the year We've Been Waiting For!!! I've been waiting for this moment for more than a year... remember way back to November of 2009? Feels like forever ago.
This year marks a big step in our little family. As anticipated, we are growing our family! We will be adding to our little nest through the miracle of adoption. The anatomy of our family will be forever changed and we could not be happier!
All the way across the world there is a little girl... we don't know who she is. We don't know her face, her age, or anything about her at all... other than the fact that circumstances will bring us together as a family. All we can do is trust God to make our paths meet. All we can do is to take one step forward, in faith, trusting that eventually we will find our feet on African soil making their way to ourGirl.
The specifics?
We have filed for adoption of a bebe-2yo little girl in Ethiopia... Our agency is Illien Adoptions International. We expect this process to take anywhere from 12 to 18 months. Yes, it will be expensive. Yes, it will be an emotional trial. Yes, there are many many unknowns out there that have/have yet/and will present themselves to us on this journey--- BUT we feel without a shadow of a doubt, that our family is meant to reach out into this world and bring an orphan home. In adoption (or even pregnancy) we can't control everything... at some point you have to let go of the illusion of control and step out in Faith, trusting God's will in our lives. We trust that our Heavenly Father will meet us there and carry us to her and her to us. He will make a way for us both.... It's an unlikely story of Love. But 'unlikely' is our God's specialty. So we look forward down this path with eyes lifted!
This image is taken from our agency's site... they have amazing images there. :)
So basically I'm staring this year in the face and wondering about many things:
Will we be moving this year? Will we move back to Texas? Will it be (crossing our fingers) overseas? Will we be parents of three by 2012? Will the adoptions be short and easy? Long and difficult? Are we sticking around in BatonRouge for another year or three? What will me turning 30 feel like? Should I let mustard.seed.photography grow with wild abandon adding more photographers, editors, and a studio space? Should I keep it small and neat and maintain my position as a niche indie.photographer? Will I feel this new bebe sleep on my chest... feeling her hot little breath on my neck? Or is that further away? Will the boys become world travelers this year with hours packed away on airplanes... walking the streets of new places, learning new customs, making new friends?
At this point, Jan. 4th, 2011- I have no idea of the answers. And my personality lends itself to being a little impatient... wanting to control mostly everything. BUT when I look over my list of uncertainties, it's obvious that no matter how these questions are answered, we are living an abundantly blessed life. I'm not sure what the Big Picture of 2011 will be... but I'm completely certain that God will be there in the details, hand tailoring exactly what we need. Today I am at peace! And I'm hoping that tomorrow I will wake up with the same peace... but if not, I'll choose to center myself around the things in my life that are unchanging.
Good things are on the horizon! I don't want to miss today by waiting on tomorrow... So YOU! 2011? Don't even try to come at me all loomy and up.in.the.air! That may would have worked in 2010 or something- but not now, Sucker. Dude, I'm almost THIRTY- which means I've got this thing.
In the meantime, I plan on choosing joy everyday and wait for all these questions to reveal their answers. But between you and me? I'd like to be overseas, with a bebe, that comes to us rather quickly and painlessly, with happy/healthy/growing boys experiencing a different culture... annnnnnd i'd like to find myself in a moment where I'm walking down a market street, with my bebeGirl wrapped around me, sleeping soundly, the top of her head smelling like Heaven. My boys holding my hands walking beside me taking in all that they see... with Marcus' keeping us all safe in his stride. It certainly would take many minor.miracles to piece this little dream together this year- but it is certainly possible. SO I'll think on it while I fold clothes and tend my men. :)
For now, we will be focusing on some up coming job news, our home study, some exciting fund.raising opportunities, James' spring Pre.School semester, and a very full winter/spring mustard.seed schedule!
To keep my heart busy, I'm on a quest to find some amazing Africa/Ethiopia/Adoption art prints/jewelry. I'm currently obsessed with filling our nest with it's image. Because after all, this country (and more specifically a Community, a Family, a Woman) will give us the most Precious Resource it has... and I want to be reminded of this everyday. :) So let me know if you have a favorite resource!
source here! *This was made by an expectant dad to his wife as they awaited the arrival of their sweet son... It makes me cry when I see it. It's amazing. Annnnnd I think I'd die if I could have my own print...
***And it can't go without saying, THANK YOU to all that have followed my story, my work, and my little family... Your encouragement has gone a long way and I'm grateful for your time and sentiments. Please keep up with this journey! We will need the company!! ;)
peace, love, and notarized paperwork trails.
xo
lmkw
2 comments:
As a crusader for genital integrity for all children, I will pray that your little girl will never know the pain of FGM, so that she can look at you for the first time and know that she is safe and without fear. claire
Oh, Lindsey, I do love your heart. And I'm giddy with excitement about everything this year will hold for you! BTW, my vote is you move back to Texas, but of course I would like your dream to come true, too. :) Y'all are a precious family! Praying for you as you wait on the Lord!
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